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Ten Things I’m More Excited to do on November 6th than Voting:

The Presidential Election is a mere 8 days away, but for some reason the all hot and bothered feeling I had to “x” the box with the candidates I’m voting for has been reduced to complete apathy for the entire event.  Election days has become nothing but a symbol of the end of having to see ads on television where Obama and Mitt just shred each other with nonsense that doesn’t mean jack shit to an 18 year-old voter.  I’m pumped for the day I go to Youtube to hear the one tv announcer say, “That’s kinda gay” and I don’t have to first suffer through hearing “Obama gets it” first.  I am tired of having to make fun of the way Mitt says, “I’m Mitt Romney and I approve this message” every time I’m attempting to watch college football on a Saturday afternoon.  My apathy stems from the fact that it doesn’t matter who wins the election this year. Partisan attitudes and a two-party system have defeated the idea that democracy can fix our problems.  Nothing is accomplished by the government because the republicans and democrats are busy jacking off their party members and gaining party support by disagreeing with the opposing party.  It no longer matters if a bill is good for the US, because if a senator is a republican and this helpful bill is pro-left then the next primary is going to feature his opponent slaughtering him to bits about how he supports leftist legislature.  I was shown a video which has substantially altered my paradigm on voting in November.  Take a look….  No one likes hearing what Will from HBO’s “The Newsroom” had to say, but it really does shift the way you think, does it not?  We’re living in an America where our stature among the other country’s in the world is flailing faster than our own economy.  We live in America where people are more worried about what Iran, Israel, and Afghanistan are doing than what is going on in our own country.  In the most recent Presidential debate, the question was asked what is the greatest threat to present day American National Security.  President Obama answered: “Terrorist networks” and Governor Romney answered “A nuclear Iran”.  What both men fail to realize is there are too many problems here to worry about what is occurring in other nations.  The greatest threat to American National Security is that America is becoming an economic and political shithole.  America is hardly able to take care of its own citizens and its own problems today.  How can we expect to solve the problems of every goddamn country in the world when we’re busy ignoring our own fucking problems?  America is not the greatest country in the world and we need to stop pretending we are.  Until we get a candidate who looks at every citizen in the world and says, “America is not the greatest country in the world anymore.  We have problems that must be fixed before we attempt to fix the problems of the entire globe” I will not be excited even though I will vote.  I vote because voting is important; however, no matter for whom you cast your vote on November 6th, you’re voting for someone who like Peter and Lois Griffin is ignoring the squid.  Peter and Lois are Obama and Romney.  The squid is the fact that America is no longer the greatest country in the world.  The table cloth and contents are America’s National Security and standing among the leading nations of the world.  The “earthquake” and “a truck going by” are the equivalents of a terrorist networks and a nuclear Iran.  Obama and Romney make excuses for why our National Security is threatened, but they are ignoring that it is America’s free-fall here at home and instead blame it on some things which sound scary and make people think “Wow, if he fixes that we’ll be so safe”.  So, when you go to vote, remember you’re voting for Peter and Lois Griffin….they seem so different and have different excuses for why what has occurred and is occurring, but in the end, they’re ignoring the squid….Now the list.

#10 Go to Engineering Class:

I fucking hate my engineering class.  It makes me vomit thinking of how awful it is, but nonetheless at least it’s learning something constructive and participating in something that will make a positive impact on my life.

#9 Eat Lunch:

Rarely do I ear lunch anymore, but on Tuesdays and Thursday I often am able to fit a stop in at a campus dining hall or Subway in my schedule, so that’s exciting!

#8 Take a nap:

I have an 8 am class every Tuesday, but my next class is not until 12:40, so I crush a nap between the two in order to enhance my ability to participate in my class discussion at 12:40.

#7 Listen to music:

I mean it’s a standard thing to do everyday.  The excitement comes in what I feel like listening to.  On voting day will I be feeling Coldplay?  A little country music?  Who knows??!!

#6 Wake up my roommate:

The kid is a bear, but it always makes for a funny moment to see what he says and does as he performs his best zombie impersonation.

#5 Turn off the “Quietus” commercial with the hornets’ nest in ear conundrum.:….seriously if this guy has a hornets’ nest in his ear, he’s going to need more than Quietus.  That’s a major problem.  The excitement comes in attempting to turn the sucker off before you hear the hornets going “bzzzzz”.  The race against time is the harbinger of excitement.

#4 Drink Juicy Juice Grape Juice:

I’d like everyone ever to know that Juicy Juice Grape is ridiculously awesome and clearly the most delicious beverage on the entire planet.  You want tru, that’s tru enough.

#3 Get swol:

What better way to shed my guilt of having voted for either Peter or Lois than to sweat a little and pump some iron?

#2 Play Skyrim

Probably the second best video game of all time.  I’ll probably be at the end of the College of Winterhold quest line at this point and will have to get the Morokei mask and win the Archmage’s robes so I can absolutely obliterate Alduin in the main quest line later on in the week.

#1 Play Super Smash Bros on N64

Definitely the greatest game of all time.  Nothing is more heated competition…and nothing is more important.


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